Parents, You Need to Talk to Your Teen About Sextortion Scams Before It’s Too Late

sextortion talk with son

Let’s start with a serious question: When’s the last time you talked to your teen about online dangers? Not just the typical “don’t talk to strangers” speech, but the real and growing threat of sextortion scams targeting teenage boys?

If your answer is “not lately,” you’re not alone—but it’s time to change that. Right now, scammers are using sextortion to exploit thousands of teen boys, and the consequences are devastating. Emotional trauma, financial extortion, and even suicide are happening because these boys feel trapped and don’t know how to get help.

What Is Sextortion and Why Are Boys Targeted?

Sextortion is a form of blackmail where scammers trick victims into sharing explicit photos or videos. Once the scammer has the content, they demand money or more explicit material, threatening to share the original images with friends and family if the victim doesn’t comply.

Here’s a harsh reality: Boys are being targeted more than ever before. Scammers know that teenage boys often don’t recognize the risk until it’s too late. They’re easily lured in because they respond more readily to sexual content than girls do, as experts explain.

In fact, sextortion scams have surged. The National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC) reports receiving over 12,000 cases of financial sextortion this year alone. That’s a shocking increase from just a few years ago.

And the end result? It can be deadly. More than a dozen teen boys in the U.S. have taken their own lives after falling victim to these scams. One such case involves a Michigan teen named Jordan DeMay, who tragically died by suicide after being extorted by two Nigerian brothers in a sextortion scheme. You can read more about Jordan’s heartbreaking story here.

How Does Sextortion Happen?

Let’s break down a typical sextortion scam so you can understand just how these predators operate.

It starts innocently. A scammer, posing as a teenage girl, follows your son on social media—Instagram, Snapchat, you name it. They’ll chat for a while, often sharing a fake nude photo of a girl to build trust.
Things escalate quickly. Once they’ve built rapport, the scammer convinces your teen to share a nude photo of himself. The boy thinks he’s talking to a girl his age, so he sends the picture without thinking too much about it.
The trap is sprung. Immediately after your teen sends the photo, the scammer reveals their true intentions. They demand money—sometimes hundreds or thousands of dollars—threatening to leak the photo to all of your teen’s social media followers if they don’t comply.

Here’s where things get ugly.

Your teen panics. They may send whatever money they can—$30, $50, $100—hoping it will make the threats go away. But it never does. The scammers keep asking for more. This is how these schemes spiral out of control, leaving teens feeling hopeless.

Why Are These Scammers So Effective?

There’s a reason why these scams work so well. Teen boys often feel too ashamed or embarrassed to ask for help. They fear disappointing their parents, or they don’t want to admit they were tricked into something that feels humiliating. This is exactly what scammers count on—they thrive on secrecy and shame.

And it’s not just about images anymore. Scammers are increasingly focused on money. They want cash, and they’ll use extreme emotional pressure to get it.

What Can You Do as a Parent?

Here’s where you come in. You need to create an environment where your teen feels safe talking to you. Easier said than done, right? But it’s crucial. Your teen needs to know they can come to you if they get caught in a situation like this.

Here are some actionable tips to protect your teen and help them avoid falling into this trap:

Have real conversations about online safety. Ask your teen, “Has anyone ever asked you for a photo or made you uncomfortable online?” or “What would you do if someone threatened to post something about you?” Make it clear that real teenage girls don’t ask for nudes—if someone is asking, it’s probably a scam.
Teach them to recognize a scam. Explain that people asking for nude photos, especially early on in an interaction, are likely up to no good. Encourage them to never send explicit images, no matter how much they think they know the person. Once a photo is sent, it’s out of their control.
Monitor their social media and payment apps. Apps like Snapchat, Instagram, and Cash App are popular tools for scammers because they’re easy to exploit. Make sure your teen’s social media accounts are set to private, and only accept friend requests from people they know. Enable two-factor authentication to add an extra layer of security.
Set up limits on payment apps. If your teen uses payment apps like Cash App or Apple Cash, make sure you set up limits and transaction notifications. Scammers often demand small amounts first, but as your teen’s desperation grows, so will the amount they’re willing to send.
Encourage them to block and report. Teach your teen to block anyone who asks for nudes or makes threats, and report them to the platform immediately. Social media platforms like Snapchat and Instagram are cracking down on this behavior, but they need to know it’s happening to take action.
Stay calm if something does happen. If your teen shares explicit photos and becomes a victim of sextortion, don’t panic or blame them. Blaming them might make things worse. Instead, explain that they are a victim of a crime and work together to fix the situation. Contact local law enforcement, report the incident to NCMEC’s CyberTipline, and don’t pay the scammers—they often keep asking for more.

Final Thoughts: Don’t Wait Until It’s Too Late

Sextortion isn’t just something that happens to other people’s kids. It’s a very real threat, and it’s happening to teenage boys across the country. The best way to protect your child is by having open conversations and creating a judgment-free zone where they feel safe coming to you.

And if the worst does happen? Stay calm, act quickly, and remember: your teen is the victim of a crime.

Take steps now to prevent sextortion. Because when it comes to online safety, it’s better to talk today than regret tomorrow.